How do you feel about children being at weddings?

There is something super adorable about seeing children all dressed in their best for a wedding, and no one can dispute the air of purity they bring to a wedding ceremony as flower girl and ring bearer.

My question is, where do you draw the line? Is it just enough to have a few special little ones in your ceremony? Do you love the site of dolled-up toddlers so much that you want everyone to bring their children? Do you just have too many friends with babies to exclude them?

If you want children at your wedding, there are some other important things to consider. Do you want all of these children at your ceremony? What if one starts crying or is extremely disruptive? What about having the children eat at your reception? Does your caterer offer special meals for the little ones? Are they at a discount? As the late night approaches with dancing and alcohol, is it really appropriate to have children there?

I can not tell you whether or not you should have children at your wedding ceremony or reception. That is a detail you must work out on your own. What I can tell you is that you have options.

If you really want to have children as a part of your special day you need to take into account some extra planning. Ask your caterer what deals they have to accommodate the children's needs. Ask your venue if they have a room where a parent can take a fussy child or where you can set up a childcare room. Ask a friend of the family, one who wouldn't normally expect to be invited to your wedding, if they would be willing to babysit for the children at your wedding as needed, in that room.

My favorite option is to hire a wedding day child care service. They will set up in a hotel room or in a room at your location. They remain there through out the length of your wedding available for parents to drop and pick up their children at their own discretion. They bring toys and activities to keep children of all ages entertained. They are state licensed, safe, and reliable. They bill the parents directly for their service and their rates are very reasonable so there is no charge to the bride and groom.

Tell us what you think? Children? Just a few? Bring in a sitter? Let them run wild? Or leave them at home?

3 Comments to How do you feel about children being at weddings?:

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Kathy Garcia on Thursday, March 08, 2012 11:56 AM

Another very helpful idea if you are going to include children in your wedding is to put together activity packs for the kids to keep them busy and happy, especially during the ceremony. Include crayons and a coloring book and some other quiet toys.

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balance on Friday, March 23, 2012 8:49 AM

Love children and think that it's ok to have them at a wedding. However, if you do this it's probably better to have a wedding earlier in the day. If you're having an evening wedding i'd suggest only having the children who are participating in the wedding. An evening wedding is generally more formal, and little ones tend to get tired and grumpy. Also keep in mind your guests.. you probably know which ones will be attentive to their children and which ones will let their children run wild. Kids running wild at a wedding.. not a good thing!

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Barbara Lonsinger on Wednesday, April 18, 2012 7:28 PM

If you choose to not have children at your wedding, Choosing to have children at a wedding or not is a very personal choice. You may not want any children, or only want the children who will be in the wedding, or only children of immediate family or you may invite many children. Whatever you decide make it clear on the invitation, by addressing the invitation only to those who are invited. You still may get calls from a few asking if their children are invited. If asked; be upfront. Don't sugar coat it. Just explain that you won't be having children; or only having the children in the wedding party; or children of immediate family. Then leave it at that. Also, don't have people convince you to pay or provide a babysitter. Parents have been going to wedding w/o their children for decades. In the past, the kids were left with a sitter. This new trend is just an added expense to a couple. It's always the parents job to figure out childcare, not the bride and groom.

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